say cheese

Why is it so difficult to take a decent picture of a newborn? Everyone wants to see pics of the baby, lots of pics all the time. Well, this always turns out poorly. First, i always choose the worst possible times for a photo shoot. By the time i get everything ready, it is time for him to eat, or sleep, or he is just done for the day.

You never know what is going to fit from one day to the next. An outfit that fit perfectly last week is ridiculously too small today. An outfit that swallowed him yesterday fits great today. So we begin this adventure with a little fashion show. Because it is not difficult enough to get the picture we have to first piss baby off by trying on six outfits.

Babies don't smile on command, either. A parent is left snapping picture after picture hoping for a shot that makes your little angle look like a little angle instead of a weird, red eyed, deformed being. All the while making an idiot out of themselves making endless faces, noises, and babble trying pointlessly to elicit that coveted smile, or even grin, or just something other than that tongue hanging out stare. Which by the way, you have grown to love but don't think others will appreciate equally.

Also, babies cannot hold up their own heads. A nice picture of baby sitting on the couch just does not work. Baby ends up lying flat, which leads to pictures that are just weird looking. How many people lay flat on the bed to take a picture? Maybe baby will look more human if we put him in his bouncy seat or car seat. Well, those things do not match so we must first cover them with a blanket. Get the blanket spread out and set baby down and the blanket is messed up again.

Now, the babbling face making parent is also working to keep baby's outfit lying right and the blanket flat and snap the camera all at the same time. Good thing mom's are multitaskers!